Friday, May 1, 2009

Master Manipulator

The baby is working on perfecting her manipulation strategies.

Look, what we have here is a baby that at her 1 week check up, I just had to asked the doc, "Hey doc, you ever hear of a newborn using sniffling and crying sounds to totally twist her whole freaking family around her pudgy little finger?" Doc said, "Why yes. I have personally witnessed it." Having watched her use her wiles on all of us for the past week, I totally knew he was right.

Right there, I looked at her and said, "Hi kid. You haven't really gotten to know me yet. Let me save you some time and fill you in. I'm not gonna' fall for it, so save it for the rest of the family." And so began the power struggle between mommy and one of the cutest damn babies ever.

I say "Bad Girl" and she looks up at me, with her shit eating grin and says right back, "Bad Girl!" I have to remind everyone that the number one family imperative is NOT to give the baby whatever she wants. She starts her fake little cry and suddenly everyone is throwing things at her..."Want water?" "Want crackers?" "What car?" "Want your ass kicked?" Oh wait, that was me.

Let me tell you, if for some reason she doesn't stay so f'in cute, she will definitely be able to bank on her wily little ways to get by.

6 comments: said...

Babies can't really do anything, so if yours can manipulate people, more power to her. I'm an adult and have never had that skill.

Dave said...

oh so cute :o)

nicole said...

she needs a pony....and i'm just getting that from looking at her two pictures

The Mother said...

Male babies aren't anywhere near as cute as girl babies are. They don't get away with as much. At least, not at MY house.

Anonymous said...

At least she's using cute for manipulation. When Mia was six weeks old we had to visit her pediatrician who noted that she had never seen a baby that young throw a full-on temper tantrum to get her way. - AM

(P.S. I don't know what form I'm supposed to fill out)

Katey said...

Sorry. Evil Wicked Manipulator or Not. This is the DAMN cutest kid.