I get strange looks from people on a regular basis, so it's not like I'm sensitive or anything. Go ahead, throw me a look. See? Nothing. Doesn't bother me.I was in the store trying to juggle 3 kids - 10 year old picking on 5 year old, 5 year old teasing baby, baby squealing in what I'm hoping passes as delight. I stop the cart because I CAN'T THINK and I say to 10 & 5 year old. "Really? Haven't I spent 10 years training you guys NOT to act like monkeys?" Blank looks. "O.K. look, if you go play in the freeway until I'm done I'll give you 5 bucks and I promise I'll pick you up on the way home this time."
What the lady in front of me didn't see was the eye rolling and head shaking. She turns and throws me as wilting of a look as she could muster and rushes away, presumably to file a report with CPS.
Commence 10 year old's response of brain damaging eye rolling and "Whatever." 5 year old's response is "Mom, you know that isn't safe. The cars are really big." Wherein I say, "Ok, how about the parking lot? It's not as exciting, but can still be a lot of fun." Looks. More of those looks. But this time coming from my own children.
You know, it's so sad to realize that your kids might be onto you. Apparently, I'm going to have to step up my game.
15 comments:
Yeah, my kids learned pretty early that the "I'm going to leave you here" or "Isn't there a nice trash can you can play in?" threats were just that.
Seriously, I was never very good at convincing anyone that I was actually a witch except the other mothers. THEY, apparently, believed me.
Ah, yes, the "Other Mothers" who can do everything so much better than you and think you are horrible when you say something that is obviously a joke.
I have a real chip on my shoulder. I particularly hate those people who offer you unsolicited advice on how to parent when you are disciplining your kid in public. If I get an evil look or a comment, I'll give it right back to them. Makes the kids humiliated that Mom can't keep her mouth shut...so I tell them if they don't want to be humiliated maybe they should behave themselves. Apparently they haven't been humiliated enough because they can still be a pain in public.
I had a similar incident in HEB last week with all 5 kids in tow and 375 dollars worth of groceries and a rainstorm that decided to fall out the moment I was desperatly trying to pay for the groceries, say no to the requests for candy and deal with the people around me giving me the " why in the world can't that woman control her kids" look which culiminated in me very loudly announcing " So help me God if you all don't stop , I am driving straight to Catholic Charities to drop every one of you off in the parking lot, and then I'm going to RUN Away" they stopped, groceries were paid for and loaded in the rain and everyone made it home safely.. no harm done right :)
My kids are totally onto me.
Dolly used to cry every time we went to a store. We would all be getting out and she would say, "am I going in, too?"
Um, DUH.
So we would always say, "No, everyone else is going in but you are staying here."
And then she would cry.
She finally caught on when she was about EIGHT. Her brother asked me when he was three, "mom, do you love me?" I said, "no." He said, "MOM. You are just kidding!" LOL
This is what my husband calls, "not right. Just not right."
HaHaHaHa.
My children are on to me too. It's going to be a long 15 years, I think.
"I'm leaving you here" is always met with "YAY!" "Go play in traffic" is met with "OK, let's go!" They ALWAYS call my bluffs.
I know what you mean, though, I get those looks all the time - yesterday it was in Trader Joe's when I had to put my 11 year old autistic kid practically in a headlock to get him to not eat their samples (it was chocolate, after all, and he wanted it BAD).
If I was gonna live my life worrying about what crazy people who have nothing better to do than to judge my kids' behavior in a store think, I would have called Child Protective Services myself - looooooong ago.
Thanks for leaving your comment on my page! (Female Friendship). Your blog is hilarious! I smell a book deal!
Ah, yes, my kiddo is "on to me" as well. When I threatened to leave him at the Stuckey's truck stop, he got the hiccups laughing so hard.
As for the perfect mothers, I too have had my turn, and have posted about them before. "Mommenfrauders" I call them. And they're all, every single on of them, headed for h-ll.
oh yeah. they are SO on to me.
hi there, stumbled here...:)
I hate shopping with my 3 year old daughter. She picks up everything and I can never concentrate on what I have to buy. Even a shopping list wont help! I want to start up a kids room inside the supermarket. $5.00 for 1 hour. Thats enought time to do the shopping AND grab a coffee.
Our kids can totally tell when we are full of it, huh? Bummer.
How about: "Stop fighting, or we're having liver for dinner."
Or dessert.
Liver for dessert gets them every time.
haha that's awesome.
Very good, but I did have my kids believing I had eyes in the back od my head for awhile.
xx
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